


Not Alone

by Afoolforatook



Category: RWBY
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief, M/M, New Years, alcoholism/recovery mention, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:27:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28471623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Afoolforatook/pseuds/Afoolforatook
Summary: Sometimes the beginning of something new can't help but make everything you've lost feel so far away.
Relationships: Qrow Branwen/Clover Ebi
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35





	Not Alone

Clover found Qrow standing alone out on the balcony. The celebrations continued raging in the auditorium behind him, as the Ace Ops leader slipped out the door quietly, not speaking for a moment as he watched his partner. 

Qrow was leaning against the railing, facing out over the tundra, with his head tilted up; watching the clear night sky. 

Clover wasn’t surprised to find him out here on his own. The big crowds had never really seemed his thing, and there was more than enough booze being passed out to have led Clover to be at least a little worried about him for most of the evening. 

Qrow didn’t seem to notice Clover join him in the open air, and Clover was just about to speak up when he heard the crowd cheering inside, and the final countdown ring out. 

Midnight struck and Clover’s chest clenched as he saw Qrow’s reaction. 

The huntsman lifted a champagne flute to his lips, previously hidden as he’d held it out over the balcony. The sip was short and lackluster, but he held the glass up still as his shoulders fell, and Clover heard his voice; dry and soft.

“Happy New Year, I guess. _Cheers._ ” His voice was sharp and heavy, bitter. 

Clover started forward, not sure when Qrow had noticed his presence, but concerned at the drink raised to his lips. 

“Qrow?” He asked, trying to keep his voice soft, as far from accusing or angry as possible. 

The older man jumped, just barely managing to not drop his glass over the edge of the railing. He spun to face Clover, eyes wide, then softening as he took in Clover’s worried expression, and his focus on the glass he was holding. 

“Brothers, Clover. Scared the shit out of me. I thought _I_ was the spy around here.” He huffed, the levity obviously forced. 

He held up the glass right as Clover was about to speak again. 

“Don’t worry, Shamrock. It’s sparkling cider” 

Clover squinted, still confused, though relieved and, honestly, more than a little proud. “S-sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. But, I thought you’d realized… Just now, you said…” 

Qrow’s eyes widened for a moment before falling gently, nodding. 

“Oh... yeah. You heard that... I mean, you too, Cloves but uh… yeah that one… uh, that wasn’t for you…” 

Clover stepped closer, watching as his partner shifted and walked past him, before sliding to sit with his back pressed to the wall across from the door. 

“Qrow… are you alright?” 

“I’m fine, I just…” Qrow swished his drink for a moment. “I’m not the biggest fan of New Year's, honestly. The party’s fine and all, and the kids make it entertaining enough for a while. But I… the count down’s a bit much, personally.” 

“Is it alright if I sit?” He was patient, taking just a small step forward, not wanting to push too hard, as his partner was already wound pretty tight.

“Sure, though I’m not the most fun to spend your evening with… And I don’t do New Year’s kisses.” Qrow scoffed, a harsh teasing tone in his voice that didn’t manage to land anywhere close to convincing.

Clover caught the other man start to cringe at his own joke, only to then shrug it off and take another sip of cider, looking away from Clover’s gaze quickly. 

“Sorry… Honestly, I’m more than just not fun tonight. I’m... bitter. Just a cranky old jerk who’s actually only just now realizing that he really should have appreciated champagne more, while he still could,” There was a heavy sigh, strong shoulders drooping as Qrow still avoided looking up at his partner. 

“You don’t have to stay out here with me, Clover. I’m alright, really. Go have fun. Don’t let my sour mood ruin your night.” 

“I’m exactly where I want to be,” Clover replied easily as he sat down next to him.

Qrow huffed a sigh and rolled his eyes, but Clover saw the slight tremor in his hand. 

“Unless you want me to leave you alone?” 

“...no, you’re fine,” Qrow muttered, throwing his arms over his knees and resting his chin on them, still refusing to look at Clover. 

They sat in silence for a while, until finally, Qrow spoke quietly, just loud enough for Clover to barely catch the lone word. 

“Summer,” It was quiet, but there was a heavy warmth to his voice as he said it like it was some small relief even just to hear it.

“S-sorry?” Clover asked, a little caught off guard, the quiet word not quite processing yet. 

“I was saying it to… for, Summer.” 

Realization washed over Clover coldly. “Oh…”

“Things… things are better now,” He flicked at the rim of the glass, pressing his face closer against his arms as he spoke slowly. 

“I...I’m better. I’ve finally got real solid things to look forward to, to work towards. But… New years always… It just always manages to make me painfully aware of the fact that every step forward is a step further away from her. Every ball drop is just another year that I get to see that she doesn’t.” 

Qrow’s fingers gripped the stem of his glass so tightly that Clover was almost worried it would shatter. But he stayed still and quiet, listening. 

“And I know. I know this is what she’d want. That she’d be…” Qrow paused, eyes focusing on the gently shifting fluid in his hand, taking a moment before continuing. 

“I _hope_ that she’d be able to be proud of me, of what I’ve… what I’ve _tried_ to do with all those years, though brothers know I’ve made more than enough mistakes. But… It still doesn’t make it any less… I’ll never get used to doing it, _everything_ , without her beside me,” He stopped again, starting to move to take another sip before shaking his head and dropping his hand again.

“Having someone become a part of every version of your future you could imagine when you were younger, and then growing up and knowing that you’ll spend so much more of your life missing them than you ever actually got to be with them… And every year you get older, you change, your memories get a little fuzzier...” 

Qrow moved to put the glass down, flexing his hand slowly before starting to spin one of his rings in irritation. 

“New Years just feels like some sick reminder of the fact that that is never going to be a problem I’ll one day get past. No matter how far I make it, no matter how much better things get, that will always be the way things are. I just have to deal with it… Forever.” 

His head jerked up as warm fingers curled against his elbow. Clover had moved closer, gentle teal eyes watching him softly. 

“You… you’re right. And I won’t try to say I know what that feels like, but…” Clover’s hand moved to Qrow’s, clutching it tightly, easing the subtle shaking. 

“You don’t always have to do it alone, Qrow. There are people who care about you, who want to be there for you,” Tan fingers squeezed around a pale, scarred, palm. 

“ _I_ want to be here for you. If you’ll let me.” 

Clover’s heart melted as he felt Qrow’s fingers dig into his palm in return, and he saw tears start to gather in the corner of his eyes. 

“Just because she won’t be standing beside you in the future doesn’t mean no one will. You… You’re _not_ alone anymore, Qrow. Not if you don’t want to be.” 

Qrow watched him carefully, rust-red eyes wide and fragile. Clover stayed still as he felt Qrow relax back against the wall, still clutching his hand. Qrow looked away from him, blinking quickly, without a word. 

They stayed silent like that for a while, until Qrow shifted, his head carefully leaning against Clover’s shoulder. At the same time, Clover felt a small pressure at his side, as Qrow’s free hand curled around the fabric of his vest. 

He felt the heat of Qrow’s breath almost as much as he heard the tiny whisper against his bare shoulder. 

“Th...thank you, Clover.” 

Clover squeezed the hand still in his gently, pressing his cheek to the top of his partner’s head for just a moment. “Of course, Qrow.” 

They sat there, Clover graciously staying quiet and ignoring the quiet shaky breathes, and waves of tears, that snuck up on Qrow, while the crowd inside mingled happily. 

Soon, he noticed Qrow’s breathing even out, pale hand now steady in his own. Clover glanced over and smiled as he saw his partner’s eyes closed peacefully, mouth twitching now and then as he slept. Clover could tell he was exhausted. The faint bags under his eyes, and the stark contrast of his relaxed posture now to the aching tension that had wound through him when Clover first took his hand, were more than enough proof to confirm Clover’s suspicion that he’d not gotten a truly good night’s rest in a good while. He deserved even just this short moment of peace.

The younger man reached his free hand up, carefully brushing Qrow’s bangs from his eyes, and wiping a still drying line of tears from his cheek. 

“Get some rest, Feathers. I’m not going anywhere,” His thumb drew gently across the back of Qrow’s hand, “You’re not alone.” 

Clover sighed, looking back in at the thinning crowd, a group of excited teens clearly visible towards the middle of the large room. 

“I don’t think you ever really were. You just weren’t able to see it till recently.”

Clover leaned his head back softly, watching his sleeping partner fondly, cheeks slightly flushed as he noticed how, even in his sleep, Qrow’s fingers held tight to his vest and hand. 

“I… _we_ won’t let that happen again. I promise.”

**Author's Note:**

> A little vent fic cause I have trouble saying Happy New Year, but I can at least say good fucking riddance 2020. 
> 
> I hope we all have far more comfort and kindness ahead of us, even if we have to work hard to get there. <3
> 
> You all have been such a, and quite honestly just about the only, bright point of this past year and I'm so incredibly grateful for every one of you.


End file.
